Rise & S̶h̶i̶n̶e̶ Roach

Hmm… Let’s roll back to this morning shall we?

6:10 AM
Roll out of bed.

Brush teeth. Check.
Facial lotion + extra (because dang my skin is dry in the winter). Check.
Baggy fleece jacket. Check. (PJs stay on till after breakfast.)
Coffee. Check.

K. Ready to report to my desk. 👍

Tap switch for pendant lamp.
Reach over my massive desk for my swing arm lamp switch. (I always wonder how I can move this switch closer while leaving the lamp where it is.)
Reach for my essential oil diffuser lid.

Wait. ::jerked foot back up::

Did my foot step on something?!?
(I should note here that it’s kinda dark under my behemoth desk in the early morning and I’m not yet wearing my glasses. Continue…)
::slow morning brain puts foot back down:: 😳

😱😱😱
😭😭😭
🤢🤢🤢
🤮🤮🤮

My foot STEPPED on something!!
::muffled scream/whimper:: Walk to Trevor’s office.

He’s on the floor doing his morning workout.

ME: ::speaking really fast:: Babe-I-think-I-stepped-on-a-roach-I’m-not-wearing-my-glasses-yet-and-I-don’t-wanna-know.

Trevor: (used to this after 12 years of marriage, grabs a couple of Kleenex and heads to my desk)

ME: (cringing inside, can’t look, don’t want it to be true, don’t follow, wait in the kitchen)

Trevor: (Walks into the kitchen. Places crumpled tissue in the garbage.)

ME: NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!! 🤮🤮 (I immediately jump up on the counter and start scrubbing both of my feet in the sink. Maybe my other foot nudged it, too. Can’t take that kinda chance.)

Moral of this story??
Always wear house shoes. I ordered some on Amazon today.

I also ordered roach traps. EWWW…
We usually see 1-2 a month in this old, mid-century home, but that’s always been waaay too many for me.
AND I’ve never stepped on one before.
Twice. 🤦